Sexting Back Then vs. Sexting Now As a Mom

The trick to keeping a relationship fun is to take all the things you did for each other back when you were first dating, and recreate them for your life now. Since family life doesn’t always allow for spontaneous late-night clubbing and disco rubbing, or unlimited alone time to play Hide the Salami whenever the mood strikes, it can be rather tricky to stay as steamy as you two once were. But there’s something you might not even realize you’re doing that fans the fires, even after all these years.


Remember when you kept your phone close at all hours, knowing that there was a good chance your new honey would get his flirt on by sexting you from afar? Whether he was looking for a booty call or reminding you about what terribly naughty things you did with him the night before, those messages got you excited in every which way possible. They still happen now—ten, fifteen, twenty years later—it’s just that the messages that likely make you the most frisky are slightly less overtly sexual in nature. Here are just some examples of sexts from before, and their counterparts now that you two are all settled down with a family together.


1. THEN:
I dreamt about you this morning. You were naked, too.

NOW: I vacuumed for you this morning. I mopped, too.


2. THEN: Let’s go downtown tonight—I want to take you dancing.

Come downstairs to the basement—I’m having a pajama dance party with the kids.


3. THEN: I can’t wait to do you this weekend.

NOW: I can’t wait to do nothing at all this weekend.


4. THEN: I found the panties you were looking for at my place.

NOW: I found the chocolates you were looking for in the pantry.


5. THEN: I got some new toys for us to try out.

NOW: I got a free month of Netflix for us to try out.


6. THEN:
Want to go for a ride on me?

NOW: I vacuumed the minivan for you.


7. THEN: Can’t stop thinking about your mouth. XO

NOW: Can’t stop thinking about rubbing your feet. XO

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