#4. At times you suspect she hates you.
#4. Scream bloody murder about taking a bath. Then, have the time of his life, playing with toys and pretend swimming.
As a kid, I was not a fan of chores. Now that I'm a parent, I’ve decided: Chores. Are. Awesome.
It's pretty common for kids to be scared of fireworks, but these strategies can help make the big night less frightening.
See, when we threaten our kids with daddy, we tell them that they don’t have to listen to us.
#12. "Get your penis out of the light socket."
Admit it: You’d never tolerate hearing these things from someone else.
It's true: This conversation isn't much fun, but it's totally necessary.
So yeah, sh*t's going down in my house and it's freaking me out.
And here's the thing: They’ll love these gifts for years, not weeks or months.
These gifts are unique, offbeat, and downright cool. They teach kiddos something, too.
"How did that baby get IN your belly?" + other things your preschooler will bring up, loudly, in a large crowd of people.
#18. Shove hats on your kids' unruly heads as they circle you like hyperactive vultures.
Something they can play on their own + learn from? #win