I’m Lucky My Naked Photos Never Made it to the Cloud

I lucked out because my naked photos were taken on a Polaroid.

My fellow 30- and 40-somethings remember those boxy cameras that spit out the thick square photos that appear as if by magic, right before our eyes. Remember shaking the Polaroid to make the photo appear more quickly? (Turns out shaking it doesn’t help.) My boyfriend and I used those black cubes of plastic to take my nude photos. Well, I posed and he snapped and shook the photo.


Before Polaroid became an Instagram filter, it was the perfect camera to take naughty photos of your lover. There was no film to develop meaning I didn’t have to expose my naked self to some kid at the local big box store to process them. The only evidence was the finished photo itself. If I wanted doubles, I had to take another shot.

My sexy photos made the perfect gift for my boyfriend when we started dating long distance. E-mail was so impersonal (no emojis!). Phone calls were expensive and Skype didn’t exist. The photos were “inspiration” for our steamy late night calls. Once I married him, the photos returned to my possession.

A few years ago, as we cleaned out our closet, I rediscovered the photos. I allowed my husband one last look, and we burned them. Now that our kids are old enough to snoop around, I didn’t want the photos in the wrong hands. Or to have to explain to my kids why I had naked photos of me.

Those were the only nude photos I ever posed for (except for my boudoir photos). Even as digital cameras became common household devices, I was wary of electronic evidence. It’s so easy to send files to others, on purpose or accidentally. Now we all have Smartphones, many of which are connected to a back-up service like Apple’s iCloud.

Obviously if somebody wants nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence badly enough, they’ll find a way. She took them with a special someone and her privacy was invaded. While I’m sure the general public does not want to see me naked, I’m definitely opting for the newer, more stylish Polaroid instant cameras.

Have you ever posed for nude photos?

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