Your Relationship Now vs. Then

As much fun as the first throes of passion in a relationship are, I must admit that the many-years-later part is pretty awesome, too. The decisions make more sense, the forgiveness comes more easily, and the laughter happens without ever saying a word.


Here are just some of the many scenarios in a relationship, and how they change from when you’re first together to when you’re like a pair of happy old gloves:

1. Picking a movie to see on date night

Back then: He said, “You pick the movie. A rom-com like Trainwreck? Whatever makes you happy.”

Now: He says, “Amy Schumer and Bill Hader would totally make a cute couple. Want butter on our popcorn?”

2. Forgetting your anniversary

Back then: She thought, “He must not love me as much as I love him!”

Now: She thinks, “That’s okay, I already bought myself something fabulous from him.”

3. Booking a vacation destination

Back then: She argued for most romantic while he argued for the best deal.

Now: They both want whatever place has the best kid’s club.

4. Home décor

Back then: You couldn’t agree on a single paint color.

Now: You both agree to let the interior decorator choose them all.

5. Ruining her white cashmere sweater in the laundry

Back then: He apologized a million times over and offered not to do the laundry anymore.

Now: He orders a duplicate sweater online before she even notices hers is now pink and pint-sized.

6. Lingerie purchases

Back then: She said, “Look honey, I bought new lingerie.”

Now: She says, “Look honey, I’m naked.”

7. Deciding on dinner

Back then: Restaurant reservations at an intimate table for two.

Now: Pizza for two on an intimate couch in the living room with your shoes off.

8. Going to his mother’s house on Sundays

Back then: She wore her Sunday best and made a side dish from scratch to try and impress.

Now: She helps with dishes, stays out of the way, and knows where the gravy boat goes.

9. Apologizing after a disagreement

Back then: Tears and flowers and lingering grudges.

Now: Homemade brownies and a promise to never speak of it again.

10. Sleeping in on weekends

Back then: Always.

Now: He occupies the kids by saying, “There are doughnuts on the counter!” to make sure you still can.

11. Divvying up chores

Back then: Sincere discussions about evenly dividing the workload.

Now: Let’s all agree to ignore the dishes until tomorrow.

12. After sex

Back then: Do it again.

Now: Do it right the first time.