Women have been fighting to have our voices heard since forever.
We’ve had to struggle to prove our worth to take on what was once considered traditional male roles, like firefighters, police officers, attorneys and politicians. It was less than 100 years ago, in fact, that we won our right to vote. Today, strong-as-steel female presidential candidates are vying to be the first woman to lead this country.
The fight for women’s equality rages on, and is no laughing matter. But there is something that is totally a laughing matter. The man cold. And in the spirit of laughing at the man cold long and heartily like it deserves, let’s explore why the man cold is all the proof we’ve ever needed that women are the stronger sex.
When women are sick with colds, we still somehow usually manage to carry on and do what needs to be done. We have no other choice, really. But men too frequently get in bed, surround themselves with Cup O’ Noodles, cough syrup and Kleenex, and let the world wait on them. The man cold has hit.
If womankind needs to go to court to prove man colds make us the stronger sex, I have video evidence.
My husband was captured on our video doorbell camera doing the man cold walk of shame one morning a few months back.
He was returning from dropping our son (who also has a cold) off at school, and made a stop at the store to get “supplies”. Gatorade, cough drops, etc.
He was entering our house to stay home from work for the day as his wife, yours truly who likewise had the cold, watched him in disbelief.
Also shown in the video is his daughter, who originally brought the cold home from daycare because of course.
The day before I mentioned my scratchy throat while we were out at the movies and my husband said, and I quote, “Calm down, it’s just what our daughter has”.
That’s right. He told me to calm down. Now, notice his walk of shame for a cold that the rest of us were withstanding while at work, school and daycare during the daylight savings time transition. He was lucky I wasn’t staying home that day, too. He was lucky.
This incident really encapsulates the weakness of men when they come down with the common cold compared to everyone else: woman or child.
People have said women are weaker because we are emotional. We might be emotional, but there’s strength in our empathy. Besides, would you rather have a leader who’s crying because they care, or crying because they have a case of the sniffles and can’t deal?
Someone has to watch these darn kids we parents have, and if both Mom and Dad are sick, you’d better believe the woman will be the one powering through. In households with two dads, well, may the force be with you. Hopefully the kids are self-sufficient, and can pour themselves a bowl of Lucky Charms.
The man cold walk of shame probably originated in ancient times when hunter-gatherer men headed out to get food, and came back with nothing but sad faces and a leather sack of natural cold remedies.
It’s simply not clear whey men have evolved to be more affected by colds than women are. But there have been some scientific studies that men actually are hit harder by colds and flu than women because of the makeup of their immune systems.
Regardless of the reason, the evidence is clear. The man cold has rendered men the weaker of the sexes. Let us claim our victory, and conquer the world posthaste. After all, the world should have been ours all along.
I’ll leave you with my definition of a cold:
Cold (noun): A common viral infection, typically mild in women and children.
In men, colds are much more severe, resulting in loss of work, laying in bed, no chores done, lots of medication and tissues, excessive groaning, and pissed off wives. And there you have it.