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Fall has officially arrived! The calendar says so even if the weather isn’t totally on board yet. Now everyone has the green light to fill their weekends with all the classic fall activities we’ve been waiting all summer for. We can walk through a corn maze on our way to a pumpkin patch carrying a bag of apples we just picked on the hay ride through the orchard. Okay so maybe I’m getting a little carried away, we need to space all these activities out over the course of the next six weeks so we can really
torture our loved ones savor the fun. Besides, everyone knows kids can really only handle one forced family activity per weekend before complete anarchy ensues.
While you’re busy deciding which thing to schedule first, here are some funny tweets about all the fall activities we love to hate.
Apple picking is a super fun reminder of why we buy our apples from the grocery store the other 364 days of the year.
If you have a produce budget of $112 and like swearing while pulling a wagon as your kids keep screaming about bees, apple picking is fun.
— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) October 21, 2016
I don’t own a minivan, but I totally would if it was the only way to get my hands on some fritters.
If you plant it, they will come. Minivans as far as the eye can see ready to pick your apples and eat your fritters.
— Mary (@AnniemuMary) September 25, 2017
No, not that kind of apple picking. We’re going to climb trees and scream at one another about how much longer we have to forage for food. Come on, it’ll be fun!
With today's youth you have to clarify that apple picking does not mean you're taking them to the Apple Store to pick out an iPhone.
— MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) October 12, 2017
I believe Dante referred to this as the fifth circle of hell.
Currently at a pumpkin farm that has 800 activities for kids & zero alcohol for parents.
What level of hell is this?
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) October 15, 2017
Everyone knows the pumpkin patch is a byofb (bring your own fireball) kind of place.
If you didn't bring Fireball to spike your apple cider at the pumpkin patch, did you even aeopcxiweqni30nlejn
— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) October 17, 2017
We’re paying for the experience. Now get in this minivan and enjoy the ride!
Why would I buy a pumpkin at the store for $5 when I can drive 30 miles & pay to make my kids walk through a field to pick our own for $27.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 14, 2016
This is so fun but if it lasts longer than ten minutes I’m gonna tuck and roll into the nearest ditch.
Everyone loves a hayride for about the first 6 seconds of the hayride.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) October 24, 2015
Sometimes you don’t even need to leave your house to have a true fall experience. Just line everyone up and try to make it through the maze that is now your home.
A corn maze but it's just trying to navigate a floor covered in Legos.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) October 7, 2016
Seriously, has anyone ever successfully made it though Ikea without asking for help? It’s the most challenging maze of all.
We can't afford to take our kids to a corn maze this year so we're just going to take them to an IKEA instead.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) August 30, 2017
You know what they say, “necessity is the mother of invention.”
The person that thought up getting lost for hours in a corn maze was probably just trying to hide from their children.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) October 10, 2017