Thanks to e-mail, laptops, mobile databases, Etsy, SmartPhones, blogging, and other new-age technology perks, many moms these days are fortunate enough to earn a living while staying home with their kids. I happen to be one of them. And while I treasure the opportunity to work at home and be there every day for my daughter, there are some misconceptions about this nontraditional setup. Here are some things that only my fellow WFHMs will understand.
1. Some days coffee is even more precious than your kids.
2. The relief that comes when your kids and hubs finally go to bed at night. Now you can really work.
3. Explaining over and over that working from home is actual work. And no, you can’t meet up on Tuesday to shop.
4. The horror of a conference call suddenly switched to Skype. Where is your lipstick?!
5. Stained, ripped, baggy-in-the-butt leggings are your most treasured possession right now. Even if you do shower, you’ll throw ’em right back on.
6. The panic that a ringing doorbell brings. Sure, it might be lunch…but it could also be that nosy neighbor who will definitely say something about your leggings. Again.
7. You’ll only brush your hair and throw on a (slightly) cuter tee when you know for sure that your hubs is heading home for the day.
8. Privacy rights are not a thing: At your “office,” there’s always company, even in the bathroom.
9. Heating and reheating the same bowl of oatmeal or cup of coffee four times before realizing it’s just over.
10. Praying that your kid will nap for a solid 90 minutes, during which time you’ll cram in six hours of work.
11. That peanut butter and diaper cream smudges decorate your keyboard, probably forever.
12. Constantly being asked how your “hobby” is going. And no, the next time you’re not going to be so nice about it.
13. The surge of anger you feel when a stray sock or dirty dish clouds your vision and demands to be dealt with when you are on deadline.
14. That when you actually put on a dress and heels, your kid and/or the dog will go ballistic because they have no idea who the hell this complete stranger is.
15. The frantic shopping trip that happens every time your boss actually wants you to come into the office.
16. Getting biannual spurts of energy during which you imagine how to balance work and play so that your life resembles a Pinterest post.
17. Calling bullsh*t on the whole damn thing 15 minutes later.
18. Knowing that most of your friends are a little bit jealous of your arrangement…but also that they have no idea how hard it really is.
19. The slew of obnoxious questions you’ll get when you tell someone that you work from home (“How do you get anything done?!”)…and exactly how you’ll respond.
20. Having days when you seriously miss the camaraderie of working outside of the home. Hello, stylish clothes and lunch out.
21. But knowing that, however useless they may be for business, you have the cutest office mates in the entire world.