Every year I make New Year’s resolutions. And every year about three quarters of them fail by January 5. I’ve decided that the reason I can’t keep the resolutions is because I’m making them too hard. As my son said, you’re trying to change your personality. So, in the spirit of actually sticking to a resolution this year, I’ve come up with a list of resolutions that I (and every other mom) can keep. Next December 31, you’ll be able to point to this list and proudly proclaim 2015 was the year that you didn’t break a single resolution!
1. Drink a glass of wine a night for your health and sanity.
2. Limit your Target excursions to once a day.
3. At least think about exercising every morning. Bonus points if you actually follow through.
4. Beat level 257 in Candy Crush.
5. Create a PTA subcommittee dedicated to sneaking out of the meetings 15 minutes early to grab coffee.
6. Eat only one of your child’s chocolate Easter bunny ears.
7. Fold the mountain of laundry before your toddler dives into it, or knocks it over and buries the dog.
8. Put on non-elastic waist pants at least once a week to make sure the chicken nuggets you steal from your kid’s lunch aren’t packing on the pounds.
9. Resolve to give up all things glitter.
What resolutions would you add to the list?