Model-Mama Miranda Kerr walks the streets of Paris in a barely there blouse. Reality star and new mom, Kim Kardashian attended the opera in a cleavage baring dress that could make Hugh Hefner blush. What’s next? Can we expect Jessica Simpson to Instagram a selfie while breastfeeding her new son Ace?
It seems like every time you open up a magazine, there’s a photo of some new celeb mom flaunting her post-baby bod and her post-baby boobs. Gone are the days when being a Mom meant cargo pants and a crudely cut bob. Now, it’s totally possible you’ll go to a kid’s birthday party and see a mom and her daughter wearing the same size shorts.
Let’s face it, there’s an unwritten, but implied, Mom Dress Code. And that Dress Code has one rule: Tone It Down, Ladies! Is it fair? Who knows? Does it apply to Celeb Moms? You decide.
Did these Celeb Moms show TOO MUCH? Or did they get it JUST RIGHT?
The Celeb Mom Dress Code
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Miranda Kerr's Barely There Blouse Dress
No denying, little Flynn’s Mom is gorgeous. But I must admit, seeing this made me wonder if someone lost Miranda’s suitcase full of bras. After all, Miranda Kerr is a Victoria’s Secret Angel. She’s probably got enough bras to fill the city of Paris.
So they must have gotten lost.
How else could you explain Miranda walking through the streets of Paris with her lady bits covered with nothing more than what seems to be a tissue. A-choo!
We say: She showed TOO MUCH. What do you say?
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Say Hello to Kim's Kardashians!
It’s great that Kim’s feeling good about her bod. Lord knows she’s taken enough heat in the press for simply looking like pregnant ladies do, pregnant. But maybe we don’t need to see so much of her bod. This dress is so revealing, we’ve spent hours thinking about the duct tape that was involved to make this dress happen.
We say: Lil’ TOO MUCH Kim. What do you say?
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Shakira's Hips Don't Lie
She’s Columbian. She’s Lebanese. She’s gorgeous. And now, Shakira’s a Mama to 9-month old baby Milan. And while the world’s most famous yodler wasn’t shy about posting photos of her pregnant bump, she’s kept it classy since the baby was born.
And while just six months after Milan was born, Shakira’s famous flat stomach was back, but she didn’t show much else. Nice.
We say: Shakira looks JUST RIGHT. What do you say?
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Holly Madison is Pretty in Pink
Hef’s former #1 girlfriend finally got a baby! And while Holly is famous for taking her clothes off, she’s done a good job of keeping them on since she had baby Rainbow Aurora last March. She even had the cahones to let herself be photographer in this pink bikino, just three months after having her baby.
We say: JUST RIGHT Holly! How bout you?
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Megan Fox Forgot Her Pants
I see London. I see France. I see Megan Fox’s underpants. And her bra. And her cleavage. And . . .
Well, what do you expect? Megan Fox is one of the hottest women alive. Kudos to her for looking so good 6-months after her first baby was born.
We say: Megan looks great and she got it JUST RIGHT. What do you say?
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Beyonce Doesn't Look Blue
Who doesn’t love Beyonce? That’s cause Jay-Z’s wife and Blue Ivy’s Mom is as talented as she is classy.
What we like about Beyonce is she shows her talent, not her body. And judging from this photo taken just months after Blue Ivy was born, Beyonce’s bod is worth showing off. We just like that she didn’t.
We say: She always gets it JUST RIGHT. What do you say?
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Don't Hate Gisele Because She's Beautiful
Gisele is so beautiful its almost annoying. And the woman who seems to have it all is smart enough not to show it all. Just 3 months after baby Vivian Lake was born, Gisele was seen on a Costa Rican beach with her baby in tow.
And while she didn’t reveal too much, she revealed just enough to show just how perfect she is. Which is annoying. And that’s too much.
We say: Unless Gisele reveals a pimple or some cellulite, it’s all TOO MUCH! Too much perfection! What do you say?
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Christina Aguilera Makes Me Nervous
Arguably one of the best voices of modern-day singers, Christina Aguilera (and Max’s Mom) isn’t a notoriously conservative dresser. Like here. In this photo. Which was taken while she was singing on The Voice. When her boob almost made it’s own appearance. Yeah, that.
It’s not so much that she revealing too much because she’s a Mom, she’s just revealing too much because she’s a human.
We say: TOO MUCH. Way TOO MUCH. What do you say?
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Can Madonna Go Too Far?
The woman who only needs one name, sometimes needs a bit more clothing. And while she always pushed the envelope between too much and almost too much, Madonna’s choices as of late seem to have gone too far.
It’s not that she’s showing too much, she’s just showing bad taste. And if there’s one thing we don’t want the world’s most famous Mom of four to show, it’s bad taste.
We say: TOO MUCH Madonna. What do you say?
