“Make your marriage a priority by scheduling sex.”
How many times have you heard that advice or read it in a magazine? Even I have given that advice to the women at my sex toy parties. What my clients didn’t realize was that this advice fell under “Do as I say, not as I do.”
No thanks to my full workload, my husband’s long hours, and the time we spend parenting two young kids, several weeks would pass in between our lovemaking sessions. Half of the time, that really meant a quickie before bedtime because that’s all we could manage before falling asleep.
How embarrassing was it that I, the sex toy expert, was barely doing the wild thing once a month? My clients came to me learn how to have better sex and more orgasms. What kind of expert didn’t practice what she preached? It’s not like having orgasms is a chore. I felt like a fraud.
One night as we watched a movie on our couch, I told my husband we should schedule sex. Being the easy going guy he is, he went along with my idea. Of course he did. What guy is going to turn down sex on a regular basis? After looking at our schedules, we made Friday nights as THE night.
I even wrote it into our Google Calendar.
When our first Friday sex night arrived, we opened a couple of beers and watched a movie on Netflix to warm up for the main event. As the ending credits rolled, my husband started to make his moves with a traditional make out session. What happened next was. . .
I’ll spare you the details. Because there were no details. I sabotaged the evening because I couldn’t stand the pressure to perform. Total failure on my part. Scheduling sex was my idea and I couldn’t even hold up my end of the bargain.
And that’s what happened the first and last time I ever scheduled sex with my husband. I’ll just stick to quickies and spontaneous romps between the sheets instead. It’s more fun that way.
Do you schedule sex with your husband?